


"if you die, i'm going to kill you."

by lyriumghosts



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Cassian Andor/Jyn Erso - Freeform, Cassijyn, Emotional, Everyone lives, F/M, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, Rebelcaptain - Freeform, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-01-16
Packaged: 2018-09-18 00:29:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9354395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lyriumghosts/pseuds/lyriumghosts
Summary: “Jyn,” he softly breathed. Even half-awake, in her pajamas, her hair messy and tangled, she still looked beautiful. Bystanders stared as she walked closer to him, each step closing the distance between them. Knowing her, she didn’t care.Another thing he loved about her.





	

“Cassian.”

 

The sound of the captain’s name startled him as he walked down the corridor of the rebel base. Plenty of passerbyers shoved him, some letting out annoyed huffs, as he stood still, his breath stuck in his throat.

 

He already knew who it was once he turned around. 

 

“Jyn,” he softly breathed. Even half-awake, in her pajamas, her hair messy and tangled, she still looked beautiful. Bystanders stared as she walked closer to him, each step closing the distance between them. Knowing her, she didn’t care. 

 

Another thing he loved about her.

 

They stood like that for what seemed like eternity, staring into each other’s eyes, trying to figure out the emotion of the other. But with them -- people who were so used to lying, hiding, running away -- it was impossible. 

 

Finally, she stepped forward, looking down as strands of her hair fell down, and he ached to step closer to wrap them around her ear. But he didn’t. 

 

Her eyes were hardened -- a bowl of frustration, of fear, of anger. He wanted to pull her closer, to explain anything, but he found his lips to be stuck together as he only looked back, trying to form words he couldn’t.  _ I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I couldn’t tell you earlier. I’m sorry I held back. I’m sorry I’ll never be able to think I’m worthy for you.  _

 

“Why? Why didn’t you tell me you were going on a mission? Much less a mission where -- where you could  _ die _ . You’re going right into the hands of the empire. Do you know how--,” her voice croaked, her eyes glued to the ground. Her entire body was shaking, her hands trembling with fear, with anxiety, “Do you know how  _ close  _ we were to dying that day? How I thought we were both going to die? How afraid I was? And now you’re bargaining your fate again, for a cause that has never done anything for you, a cause that you’ve poured your  _ life  _ into, a cause that never gave back.”

 

Her voice surprised him -- no, it broke him, made his stomach plummet as he widened his eyes, hearing her crack and break as tears poured down her face and she sniffed, trying to contain herself, trying to hide everything. He had never seen her this emotional since they had gotten back from Scarif. When she was a walking mess, barging into his med room, hugging him and shaking him, trying to make sure that he was  _ alive  _ and  _ real _ , that they had won, that the fact that they were alive was a  _ miracle _ . 

 

And he saw it all at once -- he saw himself in her eyes, her eyes that were a color of a storm, silver clouds blooming over a raging sea. He saw him screaming at her, if the tables were turned, if she had volunteered for the most dangerous mission since Scarif, just for a chance to end this all. To end the bloodshed, to end the children who were orphaned because of this war, to end the grief and tears. 

 

The hesitation disappeared, vanishing all at once, as he stepped closer and pressed her against him, squeezing her tightly, wishing and hoping that this leap of fate would prove well. That he wouldn’t die, and if he did, not in vain. She choked on air, gasping in shock, before bringing her arms around his back and squeezing back, trying to hold on forever, so he wouldn’t leave her, not  _ ever _ . That their story wouldn’t be cut short, that he wouldn’t have to glance at death and say goodbye to her. 

 

She finally separated from him, but the distance remained the same. She rested her forehead against his, breathing as deeply as she could, to calm herself. He didn’t have to explain himself, how he was doing this to end all the death surrounding him. 

 

She already knew. She already knew that she would do the same. 

 

She felt his warm lips press against her forehead, and she savored the feeling, wishing and wishing and wishing it would last forever. Their story was a wish, a hope.

 

“Come back, okay?” she whispered softly. Everything else was nonexistent, everything was gone except them, holding each other in their arms. 

 

He raised his arm to place a stray lock of hair behind her ear. “You should go back to sleep, Jyn.”

 

She defiantly gazed at him. Another thing he loved about her -- her resilience, her stubbornness that kept her alive but could always get her killed. Determination that sang in her bones, in her heart. “You have to promise. If you die, I’m going to kill you.”

 

He chuckled. He breathed in her scent -- she smelled like fresh linen and soap -- and treasured it in his heart. “I promise.”

 

Her love, her scent, her face -- all these things he remembered and buried in his heart as he looked death in the face and ran away, as he returned to Yavin IV and the ceremony was conducted; her face he looked for in the crowd. She ran into his arms, crying and screaming, all the wishes disappearing as he held her tight, never letting go.

 

He whispered to her, “I kept my promise.”

 

She was sobbing, but she still smiled. “You did.”

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr prompt requested from a list! thanks so much for the request, hope you enjoyed!


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